Last Weekend of my Holiday
The only way to cope with a weekend inside a fan forced oven is to eat frozen things all day, take a plunge in the teeming urban version of heaven (The Brunswick Baths) and drink Cerveza with lime whilst playing backgammon with a hottie.
The only way to cope with turning up to a "Dirty" thirtieth in a suit jacket and tie (sans top, avec saucy bra), high heels, seemed fish nets and raunchy knickers (you got it, no pants/skirt) and cum (moisturiser) dribbling out the corner of my mouth and down my chin and finding a roof top of mother fuckers, NONE OF WHOM ARE DRESSED UP, is to make like I am BETTER than Bridget Jones and just fucking act normal.
I was, needless to say, popular.
Favourite thing today: my spray bottle. Fill a spray bottle with water and squirt yourself and sheets periodically during the day/night. Especially good with a fan. Brilliant.
The only way to cope with turning up to a "Dirty" thirtieth in a suit jacket and tie (sans top, avec saucy bra), high heels, seemed fish nets and raunchy knickers (you got it, no pants/skirt) and cum (moisturiser) dribbling out the corner of my mouth and down my chin and finding a roof top of mother fuckers, NONE OF WHOM ARE DRESSED UP, is to make like I am BETTER than Bridget Jones and just fucking act normal.
I was, needless to say, popular.
Favourite thing today: my spray bottle. Fill a spray bottle with water and squirt yourself and sheets periodically during the day/night. Especially good with a fan. Brilliant.
posted by Darcy at 11:41 PM
10 Comments:
reading the description of your outfit, i think i just died a little.
twice.
x
Hang the humiliation. More importantly, any photos?
Doesn't moisturiser taste icky?
You really went to the lengths on that one.
Props for your realism, babes. Oh and for being the only other blogger to use French words for emphasis.
Use your imagination chai. I am clearly too technically retarded for photos.
thanks nads.
What, pray tell, is props blimey?
Blimey. I likey.
Although doesn't it mean Pommy?
muthafucka I'm givin you the massive shout outs, you know, props. 'Snaps' if you be a really beautiful gentleman.
Dont' think so. More kind of "cor" or "fuck me".
So props as in proper?
I likey that too.
Na, sis. Props as in YouRock.
Imagination not good. I need props (as in a crib). Re-creation perhaps? I can wait.
Limey is a brit. Blimey is an exclaimation. You girls. Your use of slang is *insert word which I fails me right now*.
Good grief... All these typos (in my comment)... I cant be bothered correcting them.
I meant "proper" as in "she's a right proper rooter that one" or "he's got a proper nice car" etc.
Go' i'?
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