Hell - I mean Art!
Okay long losties...what can I cram into a 20 minute blog frenzy?
Should I tell you how I look now?
I have a mullet. Yes a skanky, thin mullet. Supposedly a fullet but no...more like Scott when he married Charlene.
I am starting to look like a man - no hips, huge shoulders, muscles a plenty...it's only my pot and tits that keep me feminine. Thank god for tits! Come on, everbody, all together "THANK GOD FOR TITS!!!!!!" They are the best. Especially mine. Ah...did I say that out loud? Fuck!
Oh yeah, I am also a bruise factory. Spectacular. Thank god for Arnica! Come on, everybody - shut up darcy.
I climb up and down a three storey set and writhe, slide, twist and shimmy up, down and around 6m poles on a daily basis in a skanky big, smelly, pigeon poo, bird flu covered concrete warehouse. There's blood spattered all over our front door step and vomit smells that punch you in the face when you enter.
I am learning to sing jazz numbers after extensive pole numbers then rock out like Peaches and Courtney Love on a bender.
My acting is HUGE! That scares me. It's the style of the show but I have no idea what I'm doing.
I have been simulating sex with near strangers (No this is not a porno, it's theatre! Same thing? Damn. *rings agent*), kissing them and putting our dirty fingers in each others mouths everyday. No wonder we all got sick. I had to have a day off due to fevered sweat fest and have been sick ever since. It's down to only a cough now but one that just won't quit. I sound like my nanna did before she carked it. Nanna with a mullet.
I am, thankfully, working with the most awesome group...of men. I am the only woman in the entire team. We laugh all the time. We pretty much haven't stopped working since we got here. When I'm not learning lines I am practising moves and walking in my six inch stiletto thigh high platform boots or swimming or just stressing out, missing home and crying.
I couldn't get anyone to come out dancing with me on Saturday night so I ended up dancing around my (very spunky) hotel room (with a wicked view and a spa mother fuckers! A spa!) in the nude. Did a strip show for myself. Their loss. Put loads of money down my own knickers, had to stop myself from touching me all the time and invited myself back to my bed.
Yeah, I'm a bit lonely. I miss cuddles. I miss my home, my pets, my friends, my freedom and all sorts of other things I'm not allowed to mention.
Excellent!
No really, acting is awesome. It nourishes the soul. Try it.
I think the show is getting better but I honestly have no idea. It better be good.
I better be good!
Back I go. Wish me luck x
Should I tell you how I look now?
I have a mullet. Yes a skanky, thin mullet. Supposedly a fullet but no...more like Scott when he married Charlene.
I am starting to look like a man - no hips, huge shoulders, muscles a plenty...it's only my pot and tits that keep me feminine. Thank god for tits! Come on, everbody, all together "THANK GOD FOR TITS!!!!!!" They are the best. Especially mine. Ah...did I say that out loud? Fuck!
Oh yeah, I am also a bruise factory. Spectacular. Thank god for Arnica! Come on, everybody - shut up darcy.
I climb up and down a three storey set and writhe, slide, twist and shimmy up, down and around 6m poles on a daily basis in a skanky big, smelly, pigeon poo, bird flu covered concrete warehouse. There's blood spattered all over our front door step and vomit smells that punch you in the face when you enter.
I am learning to sing jazz numbers after extensive pole numbers then rock out like Peaches and Courtney Love on a bender.
My acting is HUGE! That scares me. It's the style of the show but I have no idea what I'm doing.
I have been simulating sex with near strangers (No this is not a porno, it's theatre! Same thing? Damn. *rings agent*), kissing them and putting our dirty fingers in each others mouths everyday. No wonder we all got sick. I had to have a day off due to fevered sweat fest and have been sick ever since. It's down to only a cough now but one that just won't quit. I sound like my nanna did before she carked it. Nanna with a mullet.
I am, thankfully, working with the most awesome group...of men. I am the only woman in the entire team. We laugh all the time. We pretty much haven't stopped working since we got here. When I'm not learning lines I am practising moves and walking in my six inch stiletto thigh high platform boots or swimming or just stressing out, missing home and crying.
I couldn't get anyone to come out dancing with me on Saturday night so I ended up dancing around my (very spunky) hotel room (with a wicked view and a spa mother fuckers! A spa!) in the nude. Did a strip show for myself. Their loss. Put loads of money down my own knickers, had to stop myself from touching me all the time and invited myself back to my bed.
Yeah, I'm a bit lonely. I miss cuddles. I miss my home, my pets, my friends, my freedom and all sorts of other things I'm not allowed to mention.
Excellent!
No really, acting is awesome. It nourishes the soul. Try it.
I think the show is getting better but I honestly have no idea. It better be good.
I better be good!
Back I go. Wish me luck x
posted by Darcy at 2:42 PM
7 Comments:
*books plane ticket*
I saw a picture of your mullette and I can assure you Ms Darcy that you do not look like a man. Tre' magnifique!
are these members of the team actually men or what?
Fuckers.
Meet you at the airport Nads.
Thanks Ukulele but you haven't seen it on a bad day and nor have you seen my shoulders! Terrifying.
What do you mean Roguey? They might be boys but they are male. Don't be all protective and jealous, it's most unbecoming.
OK do.
There are no other chicks - you'd hate this job.
Sounds like you're on an acting high darcy!
What fun.
where are you darcy?
what pets do you have?
Melbs, I'm in Adelaide. Sorry about the absence but I have been over my head with work. You are about to get a cavilcade of overdue blogs but, so look out.
I have a dog and a cat and a boyfriend. Ah...scrap that last one - I can't cross out as I have no fonts.
Post a Comment
<< Home